Romney fires the voters after they vote for him

And the crowd went wild...we'll all be out of work but at least we'll restore American dignity

From Onion: One Of Those Fucking People Wins New Hampshire Primary

One Of Those Fucking People Wins New Hampshire Primary

January 10, 2012 | ISSUE 48•02

CONCORD, NH—With the majority of precincts reporting, sources are now confirming that one of those fucking guys—one of the ones who wore a suit on television and talked a lot—has won the New Hampshire primary, beating five or six of the fuckers he was up against. "To be honest, I don't really know which one of those cocksuckers I voted for, but I think it was the asshole with the hair," New Hampshire resident Pete Harris told reporters. "I can’t remember his name, but he was the only one who looked me in the eye and didn't immediately make me want to throw up." Following announcement of the results, sources said one of the assholes is probably considering dropping out, another one is probably continuing on, and who really gives a flying fuck?

Original Post: http://www.theonion.com/articles/one-of-those-fucking-people-wins-new-hampshire-pri,27012/

‘Tonight We Made History!’: Mitt Romney Wins New Hampshire | TPM2012

‘Tonight We Made History!’: Mitt Romney Wins New Hampshire TPM2012

Mitt Romney dominated the New Hampshire primary on Tuesday as networks called his victory almost immediately after the polls closed.

“Tonight we made history!” he said to the cheering crowd at his victory party in Manchester.

In a lucky break for Romney, Ron Paul was quickly called as a distant second, ensuring that none of the candidates who the Romney camp is most concerned about — mainly Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum — will leave the state with strong momentum. Despite a late boost in the polls, Huntsman appeared poised to take third place, a disappointing and almost certainly fatal result for a candidate who staked his entire campaign on a strong showing in the state.

LP - It's Mitt.

Romney blows off a voter without health care

Romney's Insensitive Response To Woman Without Healthcare

Occupy the New Hampshire Primary Gingrich Cancels Event in Face of Prote...

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times for the Pillsbury dough boy

Excite News - Billionaire gives $5 million to pro-Gingrich group

Excite News - Billionaire gives $5 million to pro-Gingrich group


MANCHESTER, N.H. (AP) - A Las Vegas billionaire has contributed $5 million to
an independent group backing Newt Gingrich, breathing new life into the former
House Speaker's struggling campaign for the GOP presidential nomination and
casting renewed attention on the role of such groups in the 2012 contest.


A person familiar with the development said Sheldon Adelson, a casino mogul
and longtime donor to Republican candidates, made the contribution Friday to
Winning Our Future, a super PAC run by Gingrich allies. The person, who spoke on
the condition of anonymity and was not authorized to discuss the matter
publicly, said Adelson is expected to contribute as much or more to groups
backing the Republican nominee, be it Gingrich or one of his rivals.

LP-Super secret mud slinging is where the real action. Not where the snooze fest on stage is.

Everything that the Mainstream Media Covered That LP didn't do as good a job at: The New Year's Version

Iowa was the biggest election in the history of mankind until it happened and then we found found out that the results really didn't matter at all. And we were off to New Hampshire. It didn't even matter who really won the Iowa Caucuses because they couldn't figure it out; though we were told the reason that they were restricting half the electorate from voting was to preserve the sanctity of the ballot.

The Republicans continued to socialize the front runner status. As Andy Warhol once said "Everyone would lead the Republican presidential field in 2011-2012 for fifteen minutes. And with it we bid adieu to old friend 999 and crazy lady.

Ron Paul refused to fight the next war, without the authorization of the Constitution, and because of that he is literally insane. Romney wants to fight the next war ten minutes after he's nominated, Gingrich will jump the gun and invade tomorrow before even New Hampshire, and Santorum will go to war before it's conception.

By the end of the week Mitt Inc. - the walking talking Frankenstein - left town in a commanding position. His only challengers are two Republican fur ball that have been coughed back up from the 1990s, when income inequality spiked through the roof. They have returned to pick up the mantels of change and the alternative candidate.

Quick give him Super Pac money before he hurts someone

Ron Paul's racial policy appears to go back to the founders. Though personally Paul was against slavery it really wasn't the government place to restrict the slave owner's liberties of taking their slaves away. Everything government touches is awful and it is only the slave owner's liberties that can preserve our rights.

It is great Doctor Paul has three signers of this document behind him. The Problem is that they are all slave owners by golly.

Iran needs to stop threatening the US in a region of the world so close to our interest. Even the tension took a step forward when US warships rescued 13 Iranians kidnapped by Somali pirates. This is our media leaves us with the impression that the the Iranian people will be eternally grateful to the Americans for even if they force us to flatten their cities and wipe out scores of their civilians.

Fox covered the rise in child prostitution  in major American cities, with a sexy little boot in a strip club for the opening. Strippers did a good thirty second lap dance, where you can easily make out their still meagerly clothed and grinding torsoes though to be tasteful they never shows their faces. Then they cut away to a psychiatrist who mumbles something profound about something, but we soon get back to one last shot of the stripping. The anchor host then announces that we're getting this problem under control but we the audience are left reassured that we'll probably be back to the strip club next week for some more stock footage. While at least it answers the question of where all the Fox camera men are hanging out.

Clips of Iowans voting by paper were too boring for cable television. CNN decided they needed little techno avatars declaring for a candidate, like fancy technology can make up for the fact that they are actually saying nothing.

Actual low tech voting

High tech bullshit

In New Hampshire why are three smaller minded people kicking the crap out of each other while the corporately funded Teflon candidate skates by. I think some of them hope for a job once this charade is over.

I was so looking forward to an exciting debate but I found a bunch of losers talking about nothing but losers

Suicide Debaters and 'Chickenhawks': GOP Prepares for NH Bloodletting | The Nation

Suicide Debaters and 'Chickenhawks': GOP Prepares for NH Bloodletting The Nation

But the target of his hysteria will not be Romney. It will be Ron Paul.Gingrich and Paul have entered into one of the ugliest feuds ever to break out during the course of a presidential primary contest.Some of it has to do with the fact that the former Speaker got whipped in Iowa not only by Romney and flavor-of-the-moment Rick Santorum but by Paul, a mere backbencher in the House of Representatives that Gingrich once ruled.But there is more to the Gingrich-Paul bloodletting than an electoral rivalry.This feud features pure, unadulterated disdain.

Iowa thanks for the memories but we're off to New Hampshire. It turns out our flirtation with you was fun but meaningless

Occupy New Hampshire Primary Park Tour

The Occupy movement is showing up for the vote. I think the American people need to pump the citizens of New Hampshire out of New Hampshire so that the Americans can vote. Maybe CNN can just put some avatars of "real Americans" in around the citizens.

McCain Forgets Romney's Name

What a hoot. I think this is a sincere endorsement.