This might be the new way to deliver the news. The Week In 100 Seconds: May 14-18

CNN Is Terrible. Here's Why.

CNN Is Terrible. Here's Why.:

'via Blog this'

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CNN is terrible. A God-awful, wall-to-wall, epic mess. And now, they have, in their hands, the clearest sign yet of how bad things have actually gotten. This past April, CNN posted its lowest ratings in 10 years. TheNew York Times' Brian Stelter recently noted the slim upside, writing, "people tune in to CNN, the same way they hurry to a hospital when they think they are having a heart attack." But what news channel does CNN have to tune in to, to learn the gory details of its own longrunning, sad disaster? Good news: we are that news channel.

CNN, of course, has a proud legacy to fall back on, as it is the entity that kicked off the tradition of 24 hour cable news channels in the first place, and its coverage of the first Gulf War demonstrated that it had minted real newsgathering mettle. CNN founder Ted Turner, in a meta-theatrical appearance on Piers Morgan's show last night, noted that he "wanted CNN to be the New York Times for the news business." Instead, the network has fallen lower in esteem than the New York Mets, who people actually still watch, on the teevee.

Cue the handwringing! How did this happen, and what's to be done next? Well, if you listen to the people who run CNN, you will learn that they think April's ratings low "isn't much of a problem," and what needs to happen now is that management needs "to come up with a plan to restore momentum."

Shut up, people who run CNN! We have been watching CNN for a long time, because there is a television set in our midst that is constantly tuned to it, out of pity. And we've been noticing for a long time that all of the various innovations and "momentum-builders," combined with the very strange decisions made when it comes to coverage, invariably conspire and combine to make CNN steadily worse.

Here is what you are doing wrong, CNN.

US Media Loves War 'Experts' Who Always Get It Wrong | Common Dreams

US Media Loves War 'Experts' Who Always Get It Wrong Common Dreams

In a recent post, I pointed out that, when it comes to America’s wars, you can’t afford to be right. I suggested that those who had foreseen disaster in Iraq and Afghanistan should logically be celebrated in this country and “should be in the Rolodexes of every journalist reporting on American foreign policy, the Iran crisis, or our wars.” But, I asked, “When was the last time you heard from one of them or saw one spotlighted?”OWS at Zuccotti Park

LP - This is something I've long said. People can never be so wrong they can't get on television.

Another edition of what's in the Main Stream Media media that our readers aren't getting: The South Carolina edition

ABC This Week's round table put Stephen Colbert on first, more for the yucks than for the substance. The substance came from Colbert, the comedian; and George Stephanopolis, the hard newscaster representing Disney's news division, seemed to be the one only interested in Colbert's one liners.

As Colbert explains to Stephanopolis, George guffaw and water comes out of his nose.

After Colbert the round table spent a full section in which everyone got to talk on Tim Tebow and what a nice young man he was. Then they began a discussion of what Colbert was trying to do by making fun of Super Pacs. Only one person who got to say his piece, was lead pontificater George Will. The only progressive on the panel, Paul Krugman, then got in a sentence or two before he was cut off. Obviously, they didn't have enough time for a full airing of the corruption of our democracy because the Tebow section had gone a little long.

Tim Tebow praying that the corporations just won't be allowed to buy this yea's elections

Most of the panel looked uncomfortable with the discussion anyway. They appeared threatened that if they challenged the system too much then they might have to get a another job instead of their current  stenography job. As Colbert had said on another occasion, and I paraphrase, "The president's job is to say what's in his heart and your job is to write it down."

The only difference is it would be the round table that has slept through this election.

Meanwhile on Meet "the Republican" Press both sides were declared to be equally at fault for the congressional impasse and told that they needed to give a little to reach a level of bi-partianship which is what the American people are clamoring for, though I know of no one but the talking heads who are even concerned with this. They say that both sides are at fault for the fact nothing has been done - as anyone following this blog knows I've had plenty of harsh words for the "surrendering Democrats" - but blaming them equally for the congressional impasse is a little like blaming the football for being unwilling to compromise with the field goal kicker (And yes the analogy is done in honor of the NFL playoffs.

According to Meet The Press, Charlie Brown is equally to blame for not compromising with Lucy

Meanwhile all the networks are hinting/suggesting that the other candidates need to get out of the way and coalesce around Mitt Romney, the inevitable Republican nominee. After all they have had one statewide election, in one of the smallest states in the union, and everyone except Romney is broke. It just goes to show that the dollars mean a hell of a lot more than votes do, as you can always buy voters later on. Besides the real election has already happened in the board rooms of some of the leading corporations (ie. corporations are people my friend) in the country. They have already let Mitt know that they decided to promote him up to the position of president. They've just decided to wait until November to inform the American people, who seemed to be having to much fun pulling the levers, of their decision.

Romney getting word that he'll soon be promoted

Gas is going up again. It'll soon be $110 to fill up the tank of an SUV, and somehow it's all Iran's fault. Not the gas companies who gouge their customers or the automakers who made products that, with rising gas prices, will have products that will be more valuable as toasters.

Americans definitely need SUVs that can drive on rocks

Thank God the cruise ship went down off the coast of Italy so there will at least be some video to fill up the endless hours of air time that cable news has to fill.

I see know similarities.

But even after the sinking many of them made a swim for it

Stephen Colbert’s Super PAC Starts Buying Up South Carolina Airtime - ABC News

Stephen Colbert’s Super PAC Starts Buying Up South Carolina Airtime - ABC News

And according to a South Carolina news web site, the Palmetto Public Record, the super PAC is also reportedly “negotiating a substantial media buy in the Columbia market.”

ABC doesn't even realize the joke is on them.

George Will pontificator in chief. Does anyone actually know what this man does for a living?

I know his wife works for a political campaign that he then puts together a string of ten multi-syllable words that really make no sense.

Will no doubt knows as much about politics as he does baseball as I've heard several teams are trying to get him to hit clean up for them

Everything that the Mainstream Media Covered That LP didn't do as good a job at: The New Year's Version

Iowa was the biggest election in the history of mankind until it happened and then we found found out that the results really didn't matter at all. And we were off to New Hampshire. It didn't even matter who really won the Iowa Caucuses because they couldn't figure it out; though we were told the reason that they were restricting half the electorate from voting was to preserve the sanctity of the ballot.

The Republicans continued to socialize the front runner status. As Andy Warhol once said "Everyone would lead the Republican presidential field in 2011-2012 for fifteen minutes. And with it we bid adieu to old friend 999 and crazy lady.

Ron Paul refused to fight the next war, without the authorization of the Constitution, and because of that he is literally insane. Romney wants to fight the next war ten minutes after he's nominated, Gingrich will jump the gun and invade tomorrow before even New Hampshire, and Santorum will go to war before it's conception.

By the end of the week Mitt Inc. - the walking talking Frankenstein - left town in a commanding position. His only challengers are two Republican fur ball that have been coughed back up from the 1990s, when income inequality spiked through the roof. They have returned to pick up the mantels of change and the alternative candidate.

Quick give him Super Pac money before he hurts someone

Ron Paul's racial policy appears to go back to the founders. Though personally Paul was against slavery it really wasn't the government place to restrict the slave owner's liberties of taking their slaves away. Everything government touches is awful and it is only the slave owner's liberties that can preserve our rights.

It is great Doctor Paul has three signers of this document behind him. The Problem is that they are all slave owners by golly.

Iran needs to stop threatening the US in a region of the world so close to our interest. Even the tension took a step forward when US warships rescued 13 Iranians kidnapped by Somali pirates. This is our media leaves us with the impression that the the Iranian people will be eternally grateful to the Americans for even if they force us to flatten their cities and wipe out scores of their civilians.

Fox covered the rise in child prostitution  in major American cities, with a sexy little boot in a strip club for the opening. Strippers did a good thirty second lap dance, where you can easily make out their still meagerly clothed and grinding torsoes though to be tasteful they never shows their faces. Then they cut away to a psychiatrist who mumbles something profound about something, but we soon get back to one last shot of the stripping. The anchor host then announces that we're getting this problem under control but we the audience are left reassured that we'll probably be back to the strip club next week for some more stock footage. While at least it answers the question of where all the Fox camera men are hanging out.

Clips of Iowans voting by paper were too boring for cable television. CNN decided they needed little techno avatars declaring for a candidate, like fancy technology can make up for the fact that they are actually saying nothing.

Actual low tech voting

High tech bullshit

In New Hampshire why are three smaller minded people kicking the crap out of each other while the corporately funded Teflon candidate skates by. I think some of them hope for a job once this charade is over.

Excellent Piece: Shut Off The TV And Vote For Whoever Has The Least Ads on TV and you might get more of what you want

Put him in a hat pick them and then insert any of these phrases and you have the whole debate

Most of it will sound like the waah, waah, waah of Charlie Brown's teacher but if you listen close I'm sure you'll hear these well rehearse fillers: The Obama recession….can’t raise taxes in a time of economic uncertainty… the job creators…Life begins at inception… tax and spend Democrats…runaway deficits…keep the government out of our health care….gay marriage is not our values…America is a country founded on Christian values…the tea party has made a real difference with keeping runaway deficit spending in check…government doesn’t create jobs only the private market place can create jobs…the president needs to reach out. It can’t be my way or the highway….we can’t just write the president a blank check…strong traditional American values…making the tough decisions…the sanctity of life…the dignity of life…The Obama depression…lower taxes…lower the capital gains taxes…we pay one of the highest corporate tax rates in the world….we need a pro-growth agenda…the administration favors an oppressive tax policy and oppressive regulation…Obamacare…unfetter the engine of growth…pro-growth agenda…I have taken the no new taxes pledge…dramatically cut spending…trimming the waste and fat…he didn’t create the depression but he made it a lot worse…we need to fix healthcare…I spent my life in the private sector creating jobs…I know what it’s like to meet a payroll…dramatically shrinking government…the Reagan recovery…the Obama administration is anti-jobs, anti-business, anti-American…we can no longer afford to pay for these generous entitlements…I’m for fair and open trade…too much regulation…streamline burdensome regulations…too much bureaucracy…politicians micro-managing business…jeopardizing the future of our kids…thank you, good night, and God bless America.

Now you can read a nice book or go to a movie. Trust me you really wouldn’t miss anything. If somebody screws up one of their well rehearsed lines it will be replayed ad nauseam on CNN, FOX, and MSNBC because I’m sure it will be earth shattering and ground breaking news.

Golden Oldie: One of the best criticisms of the American media

Bush might have been the main target but to get at them he had to hit the lackeys in front of Bush or the American media. How the media works "the president makes decisions, as he's the decider, and you type them." Right about the 10:30 mark. The amazing thing about it is the media reported this speech failed but from the look of it you'll she just as many people laughing as those who appeared shocked to say anything this administration didn't want to hear. They were like so many court jesters.

America's Hall of Fame Of Media Nepotism: For Some Reason They Don't Understand The Life Of America's Working Class

They're Not Like Us. It Must Be Their Bloodline That Makes Them So Unique.

Show biz kids making movies
Of themselves you know they
Don't give a f**k about anybody else
-Steely Dan, Show biz Kids.

"They should convene a panel for the next Meet the Press with Jenna Bush Hager, Luke Russert, Liz Cheney, Megan McCain and Jonah Goldberg, and they should have Chris Wallace moderate it.  They can all bash affirmative action and talk about how vitally important it is that the U.S. remain a Great Meritocracy because it's really unfair for anything other than merit to determine position and employment.  They can interview Lisa Murkowski, Evan Bayh, Jeb Bush, Bob Casey, Mark Pryor, Jay Rockefeller, Dan Lipinksi, and Harold Ford, Jr. about personal responsibility and the virtues of self-sufficiency.  Bill Kristol, Tucker Carlson and John Podhoretz can provide moving commentary on how America is so special because all that matters is merit, not who you know or where you come from." --Glen Greenwall, American Royalty, Salon, 8/30/09

Some of them good. Some not so good. All of them got a huge leg up by their parents that makes them America's royal families of media

The Russerts Luke and Tim

The Wallaces Mike and Chris. They may be on different sides of the aisle, when it comes to news, but they both cash some hefty checks.

The KoppelsTed and daughter Andrea CNN

Alan and Andrea Greenspan. Alan might have been wrong about so much of the Mortgage mess but Mrs. Greenspan still no doubt gets to tap into his expertise before going on the air. Oh I forgot the news division has nothing to do with the news maker division.

Senator Scott Brown's daughter Ayla Brown, left, might have just graduated college but she no doubt was the best person for the job for CBS's Today show.

Jenna Bush Hager, on top, was thought to be just perfect as an educational reporter.

Anderson Cooper and mother Gloria Vanderbilt

Before Mika Brzezinski started have coffee grandes with Morning Joe she was having it with dad Zbigniew

Megan McCain with dad before she started blogging for The Daily Beast and appearing on MSNBC

Before Jonah was a top conservative pundit, his mother was teaching Linda Tripp how to tap phones

After Bristol Palin had her baby, she was able to spin this into a gig as abstinence ambassador. Did her mother have anything to do with this, you betcha'.

Dylan Ratigan Knocks Down Little Luke's Statement That Trade Agreements Create Jobs. You Tell Him, Dylan! | Crooks and Liars

From Crooks and Liars that's Russ' boy. Luke "I've gone from covering Keggas" to being an expert on international finance.

Either that or I just read what my GE overlords put in front of me. Remember you've got to play a regular guy: Let's go Bills and we need a trade agreement with Columbia and South Korea. I hope he at least took an international finance class while at Boston College. I'm sure he was the best man for the job.

Dylan Ratigan Knocks Down Little Luke's Statement That Trade Agreements Create Jobs. You Tell Him, Dylan! Crooks and Liars